Psychotherapy & Couples Therapy
Adolescent & Family Therapy
Trauma Treatment
Catherine Lockwood, MFT
...for a happier life and more fulfilling relationships

                                                                                                                                                       .

Living with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, commonly called ADHD – or Attention Deficit Disorder – ADD for short – can be challenging.  Here you will find information, resources and support on the following topics to help cope.  

• Diagnosis and Treatment
• Psychotherapy
• Resources
• Books
• Support Groups
• Medication
• Couples Therapy
• Neurofeedback
• Lifestyle Tips
• What You Eat Can Make a Big Difference
• Exercise!
• Exercise Tips
• Take a Short Break…or 3…
• Meditation
• Delegate to a Professional
• Coaches and Tutors
• Common Adult ADHD Symptoms
• ADHD vs. ADD – What’s the Difference?

Important note:  Check with your medical doctor or psychiatrist on all aspects of your treatment before implementing any of information on this website.

Diagnosis and Treatment

• Consult with your doctor.  A psychiatrist can provide a complete evaluation to determine if you have ADHD,  discuss treatment with you – and possibly prescribe medication(s) that might help you manage ADHD symptoms and behaviors.
• Let your doctor know about any side effects of prescription medications for ADHD.  Your doctor can tell you if the side effects are short-term and will diminish, or if you should have a different prescription or combination of medications.
• Medications that treat ADHD are NOT addictive.  In fact, if you are interested, consult with your physician about possibly taking “medication breaks” during holidays, weekends or vacations, if you so desire and there are no negative repercussions.
• Check with your doctor, but generally you should know within about a month if the medication is helping you.
• If you find your medication “wearing out” by mid-afternoon, talk to your doctor about possibly taking it in two smaller dosages, for example one in the morning and one mid-afternoon.
• Note:  While I, Catherine Lockwood, LMFT, sometimes pre-screen patients for ADHD, only a medical doctor/psychiatrist can provide a full evaluation of ADHD and recommendations for treatment, including prescriptive medications.  

Psychotherapy

• For referrals to psychotherapists who specialize in ADHD, you can ask your doctor, psychiatrist or insurer.
• Note:  I, Catherine Lockwood, LMFT, do not specialize in the treatment of ADHD. However, I am an expert at treating many emotional and relational problems.  For example, I can help with issues such as shame, depression, anxiety, relationship/couples issues/conflicts, emotional adjustment to life changes (including a new diagnosis and/or starting medications) and other psychological issues that often accompany ADHD.

Resources

• CHADD is the largest ADHD organization and offers excellent information and resources on Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder for both adults and children: http://www.chadd.org/AM/Template.cfm?Section=Especially_For_Adults
• The ADDA (Attention Deficit Disorder Association) provides resources for adults: ADD.org.

Books

• “Driven To Distraction: Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder from Childhood Through Adulthood” by Edward M. Hallowell & John J. Ratey http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0684801280/ref=ox_sc_act_title_3?ie=UTF8&m=ATVPDKIKX0DER

• “You Mean I’m Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: The Classic Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder” by Kate Kelly & Peggy Ramundo  http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0743264487/ref=ox_sc_act_title_3?ie=UTF8&m=ATVPDKIKX0DER

•  “Thirty Days to Better Focus”   http://adultaddmedicationfree.com/30-days/?hop=lovehealer

• “Is It You, Me, or Adult A.D.D.? Stopping the Roller Coaster When Someone You Love Has Attention Deficit Disorder” by Gina Pera.

Support Groups

It can be helpful to connect with others who face similar challenges as yourself.    You can find support groups through:

•  CHADD offers a map of support groups throughout the United States: http://www.chadd.org/AM/Template.cfm?Section=Find_Local_CHADD_Chapters

•  ADD.org offers a list of adult support groups: http://www.add.org/?page=finding_help_support

Neurofeedback

• Excellent book about Neurofeedback: “A Symphony in the Brain: The Evolution of the New Brain Wave Biofeedback” by Jim Robbins http://www.amazon.com/Symphony-Brain-Evolution-Wave-Biofeedback/dp/0802143814/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1333159872&sr=1-1

•  Information and referrals to Neurofeedback practitioners: http://www.eeginfo.com/what-is-neurofeedback.htm. 

Exercise!

• Other than medical treatment, exercise is the best thing you can do to help ADHD – as well as for depression, anxiety and stress.
• Exercise increases the three primary neurotransmitters associated with Adult ADHD:  Dopamine, Norepinephrine, and Serotonin, as well as the Beta-Endorphins that make us feel good and relieve stress.

Movement and Exercise Tips

• Consult with your doctor before starting a new exercise program or activity.
• Start slowly.  Easy does it.  Build up slowly.
• Do warm-up movements before exercise and cool-down movements after exercise.
• Avoid suddenly overdoing it on weekends, holidays and vacations.  Don’t be a “weekend warrior” and end up in the emergency room!
• Exercising at a moderate level regularly over the long term is best for you.
• Listen to your body; if it is stressed or injured, rest.
• Rest the body part you worked out ideally for 48 hours between workouts.

 More Exercise Tips…

• You’ll be more apt to move if you do something you enjoy – or want to try.
• Movement and exercise should be fun for you – otherwise you’ll avoid them.
• Pick a variety of activities. Ride your bike some Saturdays, take a brisk walk at lunch time or after dinner, dust off your bike, sign up for a dance class, join a team…
• Vary your exercise program to keep you interested and keep your muscles working.
• Make sure you choose exercise activities that are interesting to you versus what you think you “should” do.
• 30 minutes a day is a good goal.
• You don’t have to do you it all in one chunk.  For example, do a few stretches and lift hand weights for 10 minutes in the morning, take a 10 minute walk during lunch hour, pedal the stationery bike for 10 minutes while watching a favorite show, do a few gentle yoga poses before bedtime…

Aim to Take Up Variations of all Four Healthy Exercise Types:

1)    Aerobic  (walking, cycling, swimming)

2)   Weight bearing  (walking, hiking, dancing, stair climbing)

3)   Resistance (free weights, weight machines, water exercises, resistance tubing)

4)   Flexibility (stretches, yoga, T’ai chi)

Take a Short Break…or Three! 

• Taking short breaks on the job – or while doing any task that requires concentration – is a highly effective way to increase your efficiency and productivity.
• The busier you are, the more important it is to take short breaks.
• Taking short breaks can help you avoid getting distracted, procrastinating,  “shutting down” and other typical Adult ADHD problems.

 Meditation

• Meditation can do marvelous things for your brain and your functioning – not to mention your sense of inner peace and calm!
• The research on the benefits of meditation just keeps mounting and it’s all good!
• But just sitting quietly to meditate probably won’t work for your ADHD brain and personality….
• So try starting with active forms of meditation, such as Yoga, Tai Chi, Qigong, Walking Meditations, guided meditations on CDs, prayer beads, chanting, breathing medications.
• And start with just 2-3 minutes a day.  You have the rest of your life to build up to higher amounts of time.  Gradually move up toward 11 minutes a day – and higher if you are so inclined.
• For more tips on meditation and meditation resources, check out my website: http://www.catherinelockwoodmft.com/psychological-health/cultivating-mindfulness.  In particular, note the section on Moving Meditation.

Delegate!

• The most successful people know one of the most important secrets to their success:  Focus on what you’re good at and delegate the rest!

• Professional organizers, bookkeepers, assistants, secretarial help, cleaning services, virtual assistance and other support professionals are worth their weight in gold.

• To find a professional organizer, check out: Napo – the National Association of Professional Organizers.

• In identifying your helpers, ideally screen for people who have experience with ADHD

Coaches and Tutors

• A good ADHD coach can help you get organized and motivated in order to effectively manage your life, career and responsibilities.

• CHADD provides a professional directory ADHD coaches and other ADHD specialists at http://www.chadd.org/AM/Professional_Directory_Search_Result.cfm

•  A scholastic tutor who has experience with ADHD can help you through courses and learning challenges.  Ask your local college for referrals.

 

COMMON ADULT ADHD and ADD SYMPTOMS

If you wonder whether you or someone close to you might have ADHD, an assessment and diagnosis by a psychiatrist is the best way to assure exactly what problem is in play.  For example, sometimes symptoms of anxiety or depression may better explain the condition than a diagnosis of ADHD.

Here are some of the common symptoms of ADHD:

1. Problems getting and staying organized

Disorganization is the main symptom of adult ADHD that can get even worse with age.  It can be an overwhelming problem in managing bills, jobs and family responsibilities.

2. Marital or Relationship Problems

Most couples experience problems and issues at some point in their marriage or relationship, and may seek couples therapy to build relationship-nurturing and healing skills.  When one partner has ADHD, the particular problems may include poor listening skills, depression, failure or delays in keeping promises and commitments, and an inability to understand why a partner is upset.

3. Traffic and Speeding Tickets, Reckless Driving and Accidents

Because of the challenges for someone with ADHD with keeping focus and attention on the task at hand, driving a car – especially for any extended period of time – can lead to a tendency to have accidents and be pulled over by authorities.

4. Poor Listening Skills

“Didn’t you hear what I said?  You never listen to me!” are refrains that people with ADHD hear too often.  “Zoning-out” during conversations, forgetting to do things people ask you to do, or forgetting appointments are common problems for adults with ADHD.

5. Extreme Distractibility

Because the main symptoms of ADHD center on an inability to maintain attention, adults who are affected by its symptoms tend to be easily distracted. This includes not being able to finish projects and sometimes can lead to a history of underperformance in the work-environment or in school.

6. Restlessness and Problems Relaxing

The ‘H’ in ADHD stand for hyperactivity, which in adults prevents them from being able to relax as easily as they should, sometimes appearing to others as anxious, on edge or tense.

7. Outbursts of Anger and Irritability

ADHD in adults will sometimes lead to the individual having problems controlling their emotions, leading to flare-ups where they might exhibit short tempers or outbursts of anger.

8. Problems Starting or Completing A Task

Getting started on basic tasks often plagues adults with ADHD. This can lead to work-related, education and marital problems.

9. Chronic Lateness

Adults with ADHD are often distracted when they should be focused on getting to an appointment.  In addition, they often tend to underestimate how long it will take to finish a given task or job.  As a result, they may be chronically late.

10. Problems Prioritizing

The inability to maintain attention as well as difficulty in estimating how long tasks will take can result in problems prioritizing and planning both work and social events. Instead of focusing on achieving the prioritized goal-at-hand, individual with adult ADHD might spend hours involved with an un-related activity instead (e.g. getting a higher score on a video game).

11.  Low Self-Esteem

With all of these problems, the person with ADHD often asks him or herself, “What is wrong with me? Why can’t I ever do anything right?”  Low performance reviews, inability to focus or complete tasks, or “constructive” criticism from friends or family can cause increasingly lower self-esteem.

12.  Substance Abuse

Substance abuse sometimes develops as an unhealthy coping mechanism for the problems caused by ADHD.  Once they’ve developed, treatment may be needed to support the elimination these self-destructive and often addictive behaviors.

13.    Depression & Moodiness

Depression and moodiness sometimes develop in response to the problems caused by ADHD.  Of course if these become serious, you should seek evaluation and treatment recommendations from a physician or a qualified professional psychotherapist, psychiatrist or psychologist.

 

ADHD vs. ADD – WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE?

There are four possible diagnoses for ADHD:

314.00      Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder, Predominantly Inattentive Type

This diagnosis’ primary symptoms involve problems focusing and paying attention.

This diagnosis was formerly officially named “Attention Deficit Disorder”  – ADD for short – and many people still refer to it as ADD.  But actually the diagnosis name was officially changed.

The technically correct diagnosis name is as stated at the top of this section, Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder, Predominantly Inattentive Type.

314.01       Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder, Predominantly Hyperactive-Impulsive Type

The main symptoms are hyperactivity and impulsivity.

314.01            Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder, Combined Type

This diagnosis indicates both difficulty focusing and tendency to be physically super-active in ways that seriously interfere with functioning at work, school, home, social situations, etc.

314.9      Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder NOS (“Not Otherwise Specified”)

This “NOS” diagnosis indicates that Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is present, but that the symptoms do not meet the exact criteria of any of the three classifications above.

I often suggest that people consider Meditation.

To that folks frequently respond that they just don’t have good associations with meditating!

“Not for me. My body just can’t sit still for long in one position.”

“Don’t judge me, but secretly I’ve always thought it seems pretty woo-woo…!”

“It sounds soooo boring!”

Others have been discouraged by previous efforts:

“I’m not very good at it.  I tried…I just didn’t get it!”

“That hard little cushion that they had us sit on on the floor?  My legs fell asleep. Torture.”

“I have really tried, and a lot more than once!  But always I ended up feeling like a failure the whole time because my mind wandered constantly.”

“Honestly, I felt so antsy and anxious, I couldn’t wait for it to end.”

Of course most of us know that scientists, doctors and brain researchers are always finding more and more health and life benefits from mindfulness.

What many of us don’t know is how many forms of meditation we can choose from!

Below are listed just a few of the  surprisingly large variety of ways of “meditating” – far beyond the common conception of sitting still your legs crossed and your eyes closed for long periods.

Perhaps it might spur ideas for what kind of meditation might best suit you…

… Ranging from moving 🚶🏼‍♀️🚶🏽🚶🏽‍♂️ meditation during our day-to-day activities … to a form of meditation called “Laughter 😂🤣Yoga” (see below)! And more.

Cultivating mindfulness is mostly just making a conscious decision to direct our attention to the present moment, the here and now. One goal is to, “Get out of our heads.”  To do this, we focus on the present moment: When worries or thoughts pop up, interfering with our focus on the present moment, we just notice  them — then gently bring our focus back to the now.  We let go of criticism or judgment and just let everything be as it is in this moment. It’s a little like being on a mini-mind-vacation; You keep chasing away thoughts of work or the urge to check your emails – and by the end of the vacation, you’ve gotten pretty good at that!

Mindfulness and meditation, like anything else we want to get good at, take time and practice. But you can start to accrue benefits EVEN DOING IT VERRRRY imperfectly.”  Humans can’t be perfect anyway – we are “human!”   What can put some blocks in your road is when we criticize ourselves for not doing it perfectly!

Below are lots of ideas about how to cultivate mindfulness and with it, more balance, health and serenity in your life.

• So first, about more “classic” meditation.
• Then below are other forms of meditation that might be more suited to you individually.   

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First, classic meditation…🧘🏼‍♀️🧘🏾‍♂️🧘🏼🧘🏼‍♂️🧘🏽

Many forms of meditation and contemplation have been practiced in every culture and religion for millenia. We usually think of meditation as a practice of concentrated focus upon a sound, object, visualization, the breath, movement, or attention itself in order to increase awareness of the present moment, reduce stress, promote relaxation, and enhance personal and spiritual growth.  And in our Western “yang”-oriented culture, it’s important to create balance so that our lives aren’t all stress and “go-go-go!”  Nurturing peace and serenity can help provide that balance.

There are a multitude of forms of meditation:  Buddhist-mindful, Christian, Transcendental, Zen and Vipassana meditation as well as Biofeedback are just a few of a range of possibilities.  There’s no “better” or “right” way to meditate.  The important thing is that the way feel right to you.  And you don’t have to meditate for hours to enjoy the benefits – even 2-5 minutes of meditation can be very helpful when you don’t have 20 minutes or a half hour to spare.  And daily practice is best, but any practice is much better than none.

Example:  Instructions for a classic self-guided breath meditation

This is one classic technique that you could try out on your own.  

Important Note: Sometimes, especially when you first start meditating, it may seem like nothing is happening!  Some days you may feel frustrated at the difficulty of such a seemingly easy process or when your mind wanders.  You may berate yourself when you have trouble even making yourself meditate, especially when it’s so nice when you finally do it.  Do NOT berate yourself.  Have patience!  Go easy on yourself.  No self-criticism.  You will experience benefits – even if you do it “less than perfectly” – I promise!  It’s the process that counts – basically bringing back your attention each time it wanders – that’s it.

1. Get into a comfortable position in a quiet, peaceful environment (OK to use earphones or white noise if environment is too noisy) with your back straight if possible.
2. If you wish, you can set a timer for the time you wish to meditation: You may choose to start at 5 or 15 or even 30 minutes.
3. Close your eyes and focus on your breathing as your abdomen rises and falls.
4. When your your mind wanders and you realize you’re thinking about other things, notice where your mind went, then gently bring your focus back to your breath.  It’s the process of meditating that will help you – so don’t worry if your mind wanders repeatedly during some sessions.  Some days you may have to bring your attention back many, many times during a meditation session – and that is just fine.

That’s it! That’s all there is to it.

See below for more ideas and resources…🧘🏼‍♀️🧘🏾‍♂️🧘🏼🧘🏼‍♂️🧘🏽**

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And then there’s…

Moving Meditation!

Not everyone likes to sit still – or stay in one spot!🚶🏼‍♀️🚶🏽🚶🏽‍♂️

There are alternatives that are more active. (Check with your doctor first before starting a new exercise or movement activity.)

Here are a few ideas:

• Integrate meditation and mindfulness into everything you do throughout your day .  This book will help:   The Miracle of Mindfulness: An Introduction to the Practice of Meditation, Thich Nhat Hanh, 1999.  

• A walking meditation – whenever possible, in nature and away from traffic!  Nature can be very healing to body and soul.  Letting our thoughts fade into the background, and focusing on the moment and the sounds and sights of trees, birds, flowers, clouds, sunlight, water – as well as our own inner and outer awareness of our body sensations and feelings – “counts” as meditation 😉!

• Being “in the moment” in everyday activities:  Focus on all the sights and sounds and feelings in your environment, your body and your activities.  Give your thinking and judging mind a break and keep bringing your awareness back to the present moment.  As in meditation, when you find yourself thinking about something in the past or future, notice the thought, and gently bring your mind back to the present moment.  For example, if you’re doing the dishes, bring your awareness to all five senses: watch the movements of your hands and fingers, feel the warmth of the water, listen to the gentle splashing, smell the scent of the soap, become aware of your body supporting you….

• If you don’t have time to attend a class, check out websites like MyYogaOnline, at http://www.myyogaonline.com/home, which offers has a nice 19-minute Gentle Hatha Yoga Class that is easy, mindful and relaxing – as well as providing a warm-up and stretch for your body and muscles.  You can join up for a moderate monthly charge to use all their offerings, or purchase a single download for a low cost.  They also offer guided meditations, Feldenkrais, and dance classes on their site.

• Really immerse yourself in a wonderful, inspiring experience – with a friend or loved one or by yourself – such as a sunset or ocean waves or ducks on a lake….   Laying under a tree and focusing on the clouds and the birds and the sound of the leaves and branches in the wind….  Let the noisy chatter and worries in your brain fade away for awhile.
• Active practices include Yoga, Feldenkrais, Tai Chi Chuan (Tai Chi), Qi Gong, Gyrotonics and Continuum and more.  It doesn’t have to be expenses:  Check out your local community college or your city recreation department.
• Focus on a musical piece. Enjoying a concert in the park.

• Do a Body Scan Meditation:  Closing your eyes, starting at your toes, and moving up your body, and focus on the sensations and feelings in each part of your body.  This can be extremely relaxing.  (Both Shinzen Young and Jon Kabat-Zinn and have wonderful body scan meditations – check out their CDs.)

• My own personal favorite I call the Body Squeez3 Meditation!  It’s great to help you go to sleep: as you move your focus up your body, just add squeezing each muscle group tightly, then release, tighten, release…starting at your feet and moving up.  Repeat until you fall asleep!

• Dancing, sports, walking, painting, sculpting, arts & crafts, playing an instrument, singing, chanting, Pilates, gardening, surfing, swimming, sailing, taking a bath – in short, any activity performed mindfully, staying in the experience and the present moment. Let go of any critical voices telling you that you “should” be performing better!

• Making love to yourself or another.  Holding hands, self-hugs, hugging, cuddling, spooning, rocking, massage – while letting go of extraneous thoughts while staying connected to the moment and accepting present experience.  Let go of any performance anxiety – and just enjoy the moment. For more ideas about meditating with your partner, Google “meditations for lovers” or “tantric meditation.”
• You may have heard that researchers are finding more and more health and life benefits of laughing.  E.g. the Mayo Clinic all but calls laughter a miracle drug – just kidding, but not 😂!  https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/stress-relief/art-20044456 I had no idea that, around the world, people are getting together just to laugh together!  That there are free meeting alls over the globe – many on Zoom – almost 24/7/365?  https://laughteryoga.org/prozone/ Try it!  It’s free!.
• Contemplate:  An inspirational message, a candle, a campfire.  Notice the stability AND the movement…at the same time…. all around you and inside of you too … all the time.

Word to the Wise:

Focusing on the present moment won’t necessarily be all pleasant.  When pain 😣 or feelings 😠😥 come up, relax and meet them with calm compassion and curiosity.  Don’t fight pain or chase feelings  away, stay present and aware as they unfold evolve, transform … move on.

You can have fun with this!

You can find lots of different ways to practice meditation and become more mindful. Just google!  I just used the search words “unusual ways to meditate.”  Now I am not endorsing or condoning any of the following websites, sponsors, their practices, approaches or ads**. I am just noting that there is variety out there:   https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/meditation/in-depth/meditation/art-20045858

https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/types-of-meditation

https://greatist.com/happiness/unexpected-ways-to-meditate#1

I hope you can eventually find ways that work for you and that you like!

** And of course consult with your physician when are considering anew practice or activity

🧘🏼‍♀️🧘🏾‍♂️🧘🏼🧘🏼‍♂️🧘🏽

Resources for Classic Meditation *

• There are free guided meditations online.  For example, UCLA’s Mindful Awareness Research Center, MARC, in Los Angeles, offers free guided meditations at http://marc.ucla.edu/body.cfm?id=22

• The public library is a great free resource for guided practices.  Check out their books, CD, and DVD collections.

• Group classes, workshops and retreats – depending on where you live, your local recreation department, community college or spiritual or religious center may training and support at a reasonable price, such as MARC at: http://marc.ucla.edu/. Some spiritual organizations offer free classes.  Meditating in a group creates considerable power. .

• If you prefer to purchase your own copies of guided meditations, try going to a music store or bookstore first to listen to an audio clip before you buy it – to make sure you like the voices.  Also, some online websites that sell CDs, DVDs,  or audio downloads allow you to listen or view a snippet.

• Check out guided meditation videos.  Many enjoy the music and visuals.

• There are many wonderful teachers who come from different backgrounds and cultural and religious traditions, augmented by science, technology and research.  Look for ones that appeal to you personally.

Here are just a few of the greats to get you started on your path toward finding your teachers:  Jon Kabat-Zinn, Shinzen Young, Jack Kornfield, Deepak Chopra, Thich Nhat Hanh, Eckhard Tolle, Lawrence LeShan Ph.D., Tara Brach, Pema Chodron, Louise Hay, the Dalai Lama, Emmet Fox (Christian), James Finley (Christian), Shakti Gawain, and Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D.

Audio:

• Guided Mindfulness Meditation Series 1 Audio CD, Jon Kabat-Zinn, 2005
• Stress-Proof Your Brain: Meditations to Rewire Neural Pathways for Stress Relief and Unconditional Happiness Audio CD, Rick Hanson, 2010
• Beginner’s Guide to Meditation Audio CD, Shinzen Young, 2010

Book or Workbook + Audio CD:

•  Real Happiness: The Power of Meditation: A 28-Day Program, Sharon Salzberg, 2010

Book, Kindle, Audio & Audible:

• Wherever You Go, There You Are, Jon Kabat-Zinn, 2005

• Meditation for Beginners, Jack Kornfield, 2008