Psychotherapy & Couples Therapy
Adolescent & Family Therapy
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Catherine Lockwood, MFT
...for a happier life and more fulfilling relationships

Serenity, Peace of Mind, Meditation, the Breath, Creativity, Presence, Awareness, Relaxation, Balance, Healthy Sleep and the Observer Self

I recommend that all my patients take up meditation of some sort.  If that sounds a little intimidating, see below where you will find a surprising variety of easy ways to “meditate” for long to very short periods of time – far beyond the common conception of sitting for an eternity with your legs crossed and your eyes closed.  Hopefully it will spur ideas for what kind of meditation might best suit you, including moving meditations or meditating during our day-to-day activities.

Scientists, doctors and brain researchers are finding more and more health benefits from meditation practice.

• Positive effects on your brain, heart and immune system
• Increased longevity
• Improved focus, attention and mood
• Decrease in chronic pain, depression, pain intensity and insomnia
• Lower cortisol stress hormone, supporting memory, healthy weight and sleep,
• Increase in antibody levels, helping the body fight off illnesses and infection

This partial list of benefits make meditation look like a Miracle Cure!

Cultivating mindfulness simply means making a conscious decision to direct our attention to the present moment, the here and now.  To do this, we focus on the present moment: when worries or thoughts pop up, interfering with our focus on the present moment, we notice them, thank them for sharing – then purposefully bring our focus back to the now.  We let go of criticism or judgment and just let everything be as it is in this moment.

It’s a skill that you can easily learn – and it doesn’t have to be hard or complicated as it’s sometimes made out to be.  What makes it hard is when we criticize ourselves for not doing it perfectly!  Here are lots of ideas about how to cultivate mindfulness and with it, more balance, health and serenity in your life.

Meditation

Many forms of meditation and contemplation have been practiced in every culture and religion for millenia. We usually think of meditation as a practice of concentrated focus upon a sound, object, visualization, the breath, movement, or attention itself in order to increase awareness of the present moment, reduce stress, promote relaxation, and enhance personal and spiritual growth.  And in our Western “yang”-oriented culture, it’s important to create balance so that our lives aren’t all stress and “go-go-go!”  Nurturing peace and serenity can help provide that balance.

There are a multitude of forms of meditation:  Buddhist-mindful, Christian, Transcendental, Zen and Vipassana meditation as well as Biofeedback are just a few of a range of possibilities.  There’s no “better” or “right” way to meditate.  The important thing is that the way feel right to you.  And you don’t have to meditate for hours to enjoy the benefits – even 2-5 minutes of meditation can be very helpful when you don’t have 20 minutes or a half hour to spare.  And daily practice is best, but any practice is much better than none.

Instructions for Easy, Short Self-Guided Breath Meditation

This is one classic technique that you can try out on your own.  Also see below resources for guided meditations.

Important Note: Sometimes, especially when you first start meditating, it may seem like nothing is happening.  Some days you may feel frustrated at the difficulty of such a seemingly easy process or when your mind wanders.  You may berate yourself when you have trouble even making yourself stop what you are doing and meditate, especially when it’s so nice when you finally do it.  Do NOT berate yourself.  Have patience!  Go easy on yourself.  No self-criticism.  You will experience benefits – even if you do it “less than perfectly” – I promise!  It’s the process that counts – basically bringing back your attention each time it wanders – that’s it.

1. Get into a comfortable position in a quiet, peaceful environment (OK to use earphones or white noise if environment is too noisy) with your back straight if possible.
2. If you wish, you can set a timer for the time you wish to meditation: You may choose 2 or 5 or 15 or however-long-you-want minutes.
3. Close your eyes and focus on your breathing as your abdomen rises and falls.
4. When your your mind wanders and you realize you’re thinking about other things, notice where your mind went, then gently bring your focus back to your breath.  It’s the process of meditating that will help you – so don’t worry if your mind wanders repeatedly during some sessions.  Some days you may have to bring your attention back many, many times during a meditation session – and that is just fine.

That’s it! That’s all there is to it!

Resources

• There are free guided meditations online.  For example, UCLA’s Mindful Awareness Research Center, MARC, in Los Angeles, offers free guided meditations at http://marc.ucla.edu/body.cfm?id=22
• Did you know the health benefits of laughter?  Even the Mayo Clinic practically calls laughing a miracle drug for what ails you!  https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/stress-relief/art-20044456  Do you know that people all over the world participate in  LAUGHTER YOGA meetings almost 24/7/365 – many on Zoom?  Fifteen minutes a day can have amazing effect on your health and well-being.  Try it!  It’s free! https://laughteryoga.org
• The public library is a great free resource for guided practices.  Check out their books, CD, and DVD collections.

• Group classes, workshops and retreats – depending on where you live, your local recreation department, community college or spiritual or religious center may training and support at a reasonable price, such as MARC at: http://marc.ucla.edu/. Some spiritual organizations offer free classes.  Meditating in a group creates considerable power. .

• If you prefer to purchase your own copies of guided meditations, try going to a music store or bookstore first to listen to an audio clip before you buy it – to make sure you like the voices.  Also, some online websites that sell CDs, DVDs,  or audio downloads allow you to listen or view a snippet.

• Check out guided meditation videos.  Many enjoy the music and visuals.

• There are many wonderful teachers who come from different backgrounds and cultural and religious traditions, augmented by science, technology and research.  Look for ones that appeal to you personally.

Here are just a few of the greats to get you started on your path toward finding your teachers:  Jon Kabat-Zinn, Shinzen Young, Jack Kornfield, Deepak Chopra, Thich Nhat Hanh, Eckhard Tolle, Lawrence LeShan Ph.D., Tara Brach, Pema Chodron, Louise Hay, the Dalai Lama, Emmet Fox (Christian), James Finley (Christian), Shakti Gawain, and Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D.

Helpful Books and Guided Meditations

Audio:

• Guided Mindfulness Meditation Series 1 Audio CD, Jon Kabat-Zinn, 2005
• Stress-Proof Your Brain: Meditations to Rewire Neural Pathways for Stress Relief and Unconditional Happiness Audio CD, Rick Hanson, 2010
• Beginner’s Guide to Meditation Audio CD, Shinzen Young, 2010

Book or Workbook + Audio CD:

•  Real Happiness: The Power of Meditation: A 28-Day Program, Sharon Salzberg, 2010

Book, Kindle, Audio & Audible:

• Wherever You Go, There You Are, Jon Kabat-Zinn, 2005

• Meditation for Beginners, Jack Kornfield, 2008

Book, Audio, Audible, Large Print & Kindle:

• The Book of Awakening: Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have, Mark Nepo, 2000

Moving Meditations and Mindfulness

Not everyone likes to sit still – or stay in one spot!

There are alternatives that are more active. Check with your doctor first before starting a new exercise or movement activity.

Here are a few ideas:

• Integrate meditation and mindfulness into everything you do throughout your day .  This book will help:   The Miracle of Mindfulness: An Introduction to the Practice of Meditation, Thich Nhat Hanh, 1999.  

• A walking meditation – whenever possible, in nature and away from traffic!  Nature can be very healing to body and soul.  Letting our thoughts fade into the background, and focusing on the moment and the sounds and sights of trees, birds, flowers, clouds, sunlight, water – as well as our own inner and outer awareness of our body sensations and feelings – can be relaxing.

• Being “in the moment” in everyday activities:  focus on all the sights and sounds and feelings in your environment, your body and your activities.  Give your thinking and judging mind a break and keep bringing your awareness back to the present moment.  As in meditation, when you find yourself thinking about something in the past or future, notice the thought, and gently bring your mind back to the present moment.  For example, if you’re doing the dishes, bring your awareness to all five senses: watch the movements of your hands and fingers, feel the warmth of the water, listen to the gentle splashing, smell the scent of the soap, become aware of your body supporting you….

• Active practices such as Yoga, Feldenkrais, Tai Chi Chuan (Tai Chi), Qi Gong, Gyrotonics and Continuum.  Again, check out studios, gyms, your city recreation department or community college.

• If you don’t have time to attend a class, check out websites like MyYogaOnline, at http://www.myyogaonline.com/home, which offers has a nice 19-minute Gentle Hatha Yoga Class that is easy, mindful and relaxing – as well as providing a warm-up and stretch for your body and muscles.  You can join up for a moderate monthly charge to use all their offerings, or purchase a single download for a low cost.  They also offer guided meditations, Feldenkrais, and dance classes on their site.

• Really immerse yourself in a wonderful, inspiring experience – with a friend or loved one or by yourself – such as a sunset or ocean waves or ducks on a lake….   Laying under a tree and focusing on the clouds and the birds and the sound of the leaves and branches in the wind….  Let the noisy chatter and worries in your brain fade away for awhile.

• Focus on a musical piece. Enjoying a concert in the park.

• Do a Body Scan Meditation:  Closing your eyes, starting at your toes, and moving up your body, and focus on the sensations and feelings in each part of your body.  This can be extremely relaxing.  (Both Shinzen Young and Jon Kabat-Zinn and have wonderful body scan meditations – check out their CDs.)

• A Body Scan Meditation is also great to help you go to sleep: as you move your focus up your body, just add squeezing each muscle group tightly, then releasing, as your attention moves from body area to area.

• Dancing, sports, walking, painting, sculpting, arts & crafts, playing an instrument, singing, chanting, Pilates, gardening, surfing, swimming, sailing, taking a bath – in short, any activity performed mindfully, staying in the experience and the present moment. Let go of any critical voices telling you that you “should” be performing better!

• Making love to yourself or another.  Holding hands, hugging, cuddling, spooning, rocking, massage – while letting go of extraneous thoughts while staying connected to the moment and accepting present experience.  Let go of any performance anxiety – and just enjoy the moment. For more ideas about meditating with your partner, Google “meditations for lovers” or “tantric meditation.”

• Read inspirational literature and contemplate on it afterwards

• Focusing on the present moment won’t be all pleasant.  When pain or discomfort come up, relax and meet them with calm compassion and curiosity.  Don’t fight pain or chase it away, stay present and aware as it unfolds.  Notice if it changes and transforms.

• Use search engines with the phrase “ways to meditate” and you’ll find lots of ideas.  You will eventually find ways that work for you and – most importantly – that you enjoy!

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